5 last minute mother’s day green gift ideas
if you’re reading this, you’re probably a horrible son/daughter - too wrapped up in your own life tasks (tweeting and FBing updates about the swyyne flu and kfc) to have properly prepped a gift for the most important lady in your life!
fear not! your inexcusable procrastination might actually be a good thing. for one, you didn’t get lassoed into purchasing something that your mom doesn’t want/need, and therefore have not contributed to the waste stream. here are some easy, eco-friendly ways that you can make it seem like you knew exactly what you were doing this whole time.
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my sentiments exactly
pic courtesy of oldster’s view
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that gall-darned swine flu is giving swyyne a bad name! solve it by making me give up bacon
in addition to making people even more paranoid about kissing pigs (don’t they have it hard enough already?!!!), the swine influenza is really giving swyyne a bad name. or, as some of my closest friends pointed out, i gave swyyne a bad name when, fueled by my narcissistic tendencies, I created a word that when typed into google search, returns “did you mean sweyne?” as the first line. no, i did not mean sweyne. i didn’t even know what that was until i clicked on it out of curiosity, thereby convincing google that a person actually did mean sweyne. curse you google!
anyhow, a couple (true) friends and my marketing mentor jim hopkinson of The Hopkinson Report have pointed out that perhaps this unfortunate event is a blessing in disguise. after all, whether it be for health reasons or to pine for the mcrib like this guy, swine hasn’t been on most people’s minds since the last luau they attended. so i’m turning this frown upside down with a challenge that i hope most of you cannot refuse:
if this post receives 300 comments by next week, i will quit eating bacon. that’s right, off the pork, cold turkey. to clarify, i’ll still be able to eat cold turkey, just not cold bacon. heck, to make it even more interesting, i’ll cease all of my pork-eating forever or at least until i am older and need collagen to keep my face up. the one exception to this will be visits to the yuen household because if i can’t eat pork there, i’ll just be eating water.
is this a blatant marketing ploy? probably. but i really hope everyone thinks of it more as a way to promote a cleaner, less wasteful lifestyle. i don’t know, i just keep thinking about those pigs walking upright at the end of animal farm…with no pants on. i think about that a lot actually. it’s not healthy. here’s the segue - wait for it, wait for it…
and neither is living this unhealthy, throwaway lifestyle that we’ve all become used to.
so come to the site, comment, and look around a bit for tips on how you can clean up your act a bit. help me make living a lifestyle where we’re more conscious about where our stuff comes from and goes to when we throw it an epidemic.
and i’ll stop eating this:
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and this:
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| yes, that is a snout. |
but i probably won’t stop doing this:
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why is this a site?
swyyne has always been an experiment for me. with all of the other super eco sites out there, i've been feeling like i want to contribute something just a bit different. so for now, here are my random musings.
look for stuff
feed yourself